Today's My Birthday! Oh Great..

Not only is it nice and sunny out, but it's my Birthday today! So why then, I am so unhappy?

Because as my Birthday draws near an end on this Sunday afternoon, I realize that it has started and ended just like any before it. I did nothing; saw nothing; saw nobody ('cept for my father). Quite frankly, it was just yet another awful day with absolutely no meaning to me.

The first of the many reasons why I think my Birthday today has been such rubbish is because no one really remembered. Sad, but true. None of my family, save for my father, even remembered it was today. And almost all of my online "friends" forgot too..

In any event, the real reason why my Birthday means so little to me is because so many of my past ones have been terrible. I've had so many awful and meaningless Birthday's where survival was the main priority, that my Birthday was mostly ignored. And after a while, the whole concept of a Birthday and the happiness and enthusiasm which it's supposed to bring was washed away. Point is, after so many years of missing a "proper" Birthday, it became a pointless day. And I'm afraid to say that I feel exactly the same about every other holiday, Christmas included.

I truly hope that few feel as I do. It's quite terrible to view what are supposed to be days of happiness and fun times, in such negativity. I swear that should I have ever have Children that they will have the best Birthdays, etc imaginable.