"Blender" Magazine is Garbage

Actually, scratch the title of this post. It doesn't seem to be harsh enough, so, how about "Blender Magazine is a senseless, mindless piece of garbage magazine with shitty journalists." Good?

Yeah, that oughta work. You see, "Blender" has always been shit, but a list of the "40 worst lyricists ever" that they compiled this past week really shows how shitty this magazine is.

According to Blender, Sting is the worst lyricist anywhere. Now, sure, Stings lyrics aren't clever by any means - in fact, they are simple as hell - but I don't see how that should make Sting a candidate for being the worst lyricist ever. Surely they are worse lyricists.

But if you think that's bad, prepare to be further shocked by the stupidity of Blender.

They have the guts to name Neil Peart (Rush's lyricist and drummer) as the 2nd worst! Absolute blasphemy. And they go on to mention how Neil's lyrics in Rush's 1976 album "2112" are ridiculous. True, Neil's early lyrics were often inspired by science fiction and fantasy, but that doesn't mean they were terrible. Mind you, the reason they probably thought Neil's lyrics were terrible is because they didn't have the brain capacity to understand their symbolic meanings. In other words, these guys are probably the same bunch that though "The Trees" (written by Peart, performed by Rush) is actually about trees fighting with each other. Major "lol".

Additionally, they make no mention of Neil's lyrics past Rush's "2112" album. No such mention of the lyrics from "Moving Pictures", "Grace Under Pressure" or the album which had it's lyrics distributed to Montreal High schools, "Hold Your Fire". Had they actually taken the time to read any of the lyrics from HYF, they would have been dumbstruck by their complexity. Neil Peart does not (and never will) deserve a spot on this list. PERIOD.

And the stupidity does not cease with Mr. Peart - oh no, making an appearance on the list in at #10 is the one and only Jim Morrison. Now, I'm not a big fan of the The Doors, but you have got to be kidding me. And on a side note, they rank The Doors' "The End" as one of the worst songs ever. So, yet again, Blender fails.

And in at #18 is Ian Anderson! And all I can say to that is: "you have got be fucking kidding me". Putting Mr. Anderson on the list is every bit as retarded as putting Mr. Peart on the list. They even make claim that the opening lyrics of "Aqualung" are amongst the worst lyrics they've ever heard. Am I the only one who sees how fucking retarded these clowns are? Ian Anderson is a fantastic lyricist who has the ability to tell a story through out a song like a few others. His lyrics are also amongst the best I've ever heard at creating imagery for the mind.

And it seemingly never ends... In at #21 is Alanis Morsiette. Whether you like Alanis or not, she should most certainly not be on this list.

To keep it short and simple: BLENDER FAILS

Should you so have the desire to see their farce of a list, you can check it out here